I can’t count, even with the aid of my fingers and ugly toes, all the occasions in which I’ve travelled to a foreign destination, on my own. There was my virgin move abroad to Europe at eighteen, trips to the United States and exploits in India, Sri Lanka, South East Asia, the Middle East, China and Japan. I sometimes think travel solo should be my middle name.
I've independently moved to foreign lands, setting up life anew as an expatriate. I used to escape the chaos of London with jaunts to the European continent and I explored Italy intimately while based in Rome. There were big adventures, such as travelling overland from Cairo to Cape Town and smaller achievements, like driving myself around New Zealand's North Island.
Hesitance to Travel Solo and The Reasons
As I embark on yet another solo adventure, there are some reservations that occupy the dark, subconscious space at the back of my mind. They instil within me a sense of hesitation.
You see, I place a lot of value in the rewards we can yield from travel. For me, it's a pastime, a lifestyle, even - one that has shaped much of the person I have become as an adult. So, it's not something I want to stop, despite any hesitations I may have.
But traveling alone wasn't initially - and sometimes still isn't - easy: awkward moments have shaped my character and they continue to develop my sense of intrepid travel independence. The misadventures have also, at times, caused foreboding before boarding the plane and heading to yet another foreign country, all on my own.
Getting Ready to Travel Solo
However, following the first instance in which I got lost on my own, turned the map upside down and centred myself, I realised I had the competence to stare almost any challenge in the face, climb over (or around) the obstacle set before me and get a result. It may be simpler to achieve when surrounded by the support of others, but it's certainly not impossible while soloing.
When faced with challenging situations, such as the sudden cancelling of flights, realising bank cards don't work and you're without cash, or learning that the hostel is fully booked and you don't have a reservation, take a deep breath. Reflect briefly on the past and instances of stoicism, and proceed. There are always options, and you have a voice: ask for help.
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Overcoming Barriers: Common Sense and Reflection
I distinctly remember the feeling of dread that washed over me shortly after arriving in Addis Ababa: I learned that my MasterCard wouldn't work. I had no money and no access to funds sitting in other accounts.
I took my own advice, asked people for help and - within two days - had money wired to me from friends in Italy. I used my sense of reason and intuition, and survived.
Locals have always been helpful, particularly when the familiar look of panic plasters itself across my face.
Travel experiences have served to fortify me and build resilience. I have come to expect that certain unsavoury situations can and often do arise. Rather than allowing the potential of problems to deter me from doing what I love, I reflect on past experiences and move forward, with a sense of positivity in tow.
After more than ninety countries and twenty years of globetrotting, I have developed an almost ritualistic way of traveling. I guess it's to be expected; it certainly gets me through. More importantly, travelling independently brings me joy.
Travelling Alone Versus Being Lonely While Travelling
On a philosophical note, I feel it's necessary to highlight the difference between travelling alone and feeling lonely while travelling.
People often look quizzically at me when I recount details of journeys I've done on my own. "Don't you feel lonely and sad?" they ask, in variegated tones of concerned surprise.
If it's not obvious already, allow me the opportunity to highlight the difference between the two terms. It's an important distinction to remember.
Being alone, according to dictionary.com, means "separate, apart, or isolated from others."
Lonely, though, is "affected with, characterised by, or causing a depressing feeling of being alone; lonesome."
Although related, they're not synonymous. Being alone while travelling is indicative of independence - physically - from other people: soloing, according to some travel writers. When used in reference to travel, it can denote freedom. No inference is made to the melancholy often associated with loneliness.
Being lonely while travelling, alternatively, denotes a gloomy emotional state: negative thoughts abound and outweigh positive ones. It can arise out of homesickness, or excessive dwelling on what's been left behind.
Either can be experienced at any given point in time, but they don't necessarily occur symbiotically. You can feel lonely when surrounded by a group of travel counterparts. Conversely, I usually feel centred in place and time walking the streets, eating in a restaurant or taking public transport alone in a foreign country.
With travel experience comes valor, and strength of character.
In global and fast-paced societies, it's rare that you'll be alone for long, unless hiking a remote volcano, climbing a tree in the Amazon Rainforest or riding across the desert on the back of a lumpy camel. Interaction occurs frequently (if unafraid to speak), so solo travel frequently morphs into companion travel, sometimes for a significant period of time. I regularly meet likeminded travellers while abroad who are happy to share an hour, a day or sometimes even a week in one another's company.
Travel Solo - What are the Benefits?
If you're considering a solo voyage but feel overwhelmed and unconvinced, take note of the benefits I've received over the years. They're qualities, characteristics and experiences you'll almost certainly acquire if you afford yourself the opportunity to try going solo.
- Complete freedom (aka being 100% selfish - doing it entirely your way). You will be the master of your own itinerary. No-one will have the decision-making power except for you. Plan your days as you please, without the stress and pressure of having to please travel companions. There are few greater, more liberating feelings than having a sense of complete freedom while on the open road.
- Getting to know yourself more intimately. Your likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses will become clear. You will also have many opportunities to sit by yourself and simply be. There won't be the distraction of having a travel companion to divert your attention away from whatever it is that's piqued your interest. Embrace the moments of being truly alone: it's blissful and personally educational.
- Improved problem-solving and decision-making ability. There are times when you'll need to be courageous. There won't be anyone else around who can make the hard decisions for you. This means personal growth which, at first, can really challenge us. However, once you've cleared the hurdle a couple of times, you'll be a master problem-solver and perceptive decision-maker. It will make you more employable, traits that are very attractive to employers, and it'll likely give you clarity about decisions that need to be made in your life outside of travel.
- Receiving a confidence boost. There are fewer more authentic tasks than getting on a plane, flying somewhere new and discovering it, all on your own. Without the security of a social buffer, forging your way through new terrain will add strength of character and do wonders to your levels of esteem and self-confidence.
- Leaving your comfort zone. This could be anything from walking confidently into a crowded room of travellers and striking up a conversation with a stranger to navigating your way through a large city on your own using the complicated public transport network. You'll be troubleshooting things without the input of the friends who'd normally be travelling with you. This will help with confidence, building esteem and sharpening your problem-solving skills.
- Opportunity to meet fascinating people. You won't be stuck to a travel companion, which makes you more appealing to others. Often when we travel in two (or more), we tend to stick together like glue. When you're alone, you're less intimidating to others, especially those who aren't fluent in your mother tongue. As a soloist, you're more likely to strike up conversations with locals and other travellers. There's a good chance that you'll be more sociable in general. Sound like an oxymoron?
- Take time out guilt-free. Feeling tired and jetlagged? It's okay. Take the day off. Read a book, sit in a cafe or lounge about the hostel. If you're with friends, there's often pressure to keep going, a feeling of letting the group down if you want to stop. When you're travelling solo, there's no guilt associated with taking a nana nap mid-afternoon between sightseeing and nighttime festivities.
- Improve communication and language skills. Do you often find yourself relying on bilingual friends to do the interpreting when travelling? Put yourself in a foreign environment without those friends and it becomes you who has to speak in the new language. There's no better way to learn a language than by fully immersing yourself in it. You won't have others to rely on, so your foreign language skills will improve. You'll also be forced to speak to other travellers, for advice, recommendations and directions. Going solo means improving your communication skills in general. It's another positive trait employers seek in potential employees.
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Ready to Travel Solo Yet?
There are many more benefits and examples of solo travel I could share. However, I could tell a thousand stories and share innumerable benefits on the subject and never convince you to take the plunge. It's a personal choice, one that must be carefully evaluated.
I'm just glad I took the dive into solo waters when I was eighteen; I've never looked back. You won't know how rewarding it can be until you indulge your curiosity and dive in, head first.
Here's the moral of the story: if you're brave enough to book a solo adventure, you'll see the world through different eyes. More importantly, you may never again want to travel the world the way in which you did before.
Go on, give it a go. You won't look back!
